Ok my Friends. Have you ever just had a moment. I mean one of those moments where you just stand there shaking your head asking yourself what just happened. Well get ready because this was my moment.
Today started out like any other day on my homestead. Feeding the little dinosaurs (chickens) and my meat bricks (pigs). I am in peak planting season here. Starting lots of veggies and flowers. I am so happy to say my greenhouse is booming with life. So everything has gone smoothly. For way to long! I should have know better.
Now let me just back up for a moment and set the stage.
So I have new neighbors that just moved it. They literally are still currently moving boxes into the house. I have not meet them yet. Our interaction has consisted of the neighborly head nod and smile. I can tell she is an older lady whom seems very pleasant thus far with maybe 4 to 5 grown adult children. I am guessing the relation because of course we have not meet officially yet. So now that I have covered that we can continue.
In the front of my property safe from the chickens I had around 10 very large soil bags that I had used for temporary garden beds. I planted so many veggie starts that grew so fast I needed to place them somewhere until I had time to place them in the ground. And this was my temporary solution. And let me just say in regards to the soil bags they worked Amazing. The plants thrived!
Now it is about 90 degrees today. I have been outside for hours. Their are maybe 10 people over at the neighbors house all helping move in. Chipper happy, had no idea I was about to change their day. They are able to see me clearly working in the front due to me not having that area fenced in. This might change after this! I may just move. All still to be determined.
So here I am be-bopping around. Being a happy little gardener. So very proud that my idea has worked and been successful. The veggie starts are looking amazing and growing wonderfully.
In moving these, What I am having to do is pick up each bag and carry it over about 15 feet to the garden plot that has been set up. Ya’ll these bags are heavy. I mean saturated with growth and veggies. And I’m slick with sweat so with each bag it is getting a bit harder and heavier to move. But I am hard headed and have my mind set that I will get all of these planted into their new home today.
Now I consider myself a tough girl. I try not to be squimish in regards to many things. I mean if you work and raise farm animals you have to get a tough skin. BUT there are a few things that still get me. Your about to meet one.
As I go to move another soil bag I am unable to carry it with only my hands like I have been doing. I mean this is like the 7th bag. I am getting a bit weak so I place it on my forearms for better control. Now
NOTE I am walking toward my neighbor direction at this time that is where the new garden space is. And as I get about 1/2 way there I feel something on my arm. Honestly for the first 20 seconds I do not give it any thought. At this time I am thinking it is my sweat and dirt on my arm rubbing and dripping off.
I was so very wrong. Like crazy wrong. I start to feel movement like lots of movement. LOTS. Oh my goodness. Freak out mode activated. I can’t make it to the garden plot. Something is on me. Crawling and moving all over my arms. I am starting to panic.
Side Note: I am not a fan of creepy crawlers. But we have a understanding. I will respect there space and they do not touch me. Now if this happens I try to remain calm and in doing this I say this little chant :don’t freak out” over and over again until the situation is resolved.
So here I am carrying this soil bag and having a bit of a meltdown so what do I do? I drop the bag. The movement and crawling had become to much. I can’t think of anything except get this off of me. And what is it? I mean seriously what is it?
I am thinking calm down Mandy. It is just a rolly polly. I had seen so many. But my deep insides knew better, This was no stinking rolly polly.
As I drop the bag I realize I am doing my chant “dont freak out” over and over. Trying to keep myself calm.
And as I drop the bag. Holy Crap maggots. MAGGOTS are crawling, rolling, flipping living on my arm. The chanting has not worked. I am full on freaking out. Screaming. Cussing yelling for help. I am covered. I try to wipe them off with my gloves but that just smooshes them into my arm and now my glove is covered with these little meaty bits. All I can think of is get them off of me. I mean do they bite? I have no idea. But in my mind they are going to bite me. There are 100’s of them. Everywhere.
Without even thinking I rip my t-shirt off and start using it as a towel and weapon to get these little moving rice pieces off of me. I start running toward my porch and once I get there and stop to access my arm. They are definitely not coming in my house. I throw my t-shirt on the ground just standing there sweating covered in dirt. and meat pieces I may have cried a bit. And completely out of breath due to my recent escape from assignation. And let me just say this was not one of those slow motion Baywatch moments. Oh no. This was an utter disaster. As I am placing one of my boobs back into it proper and upright position back into my bra I look up.
Ya’ll Oh Ya’ll. The looks on those poor people’s faces. As I take a moment to look at each bi-stander so innocent I really do not know what to say. Or what to do. I am still freaking out in my head and needing to go properly disinfect my maggot arm. So all I say is… Maggots. and I turn around and walk inside.
So I can now say I have meet the neighbors. They seem nice ya’ll. lol. Nothing like first impressions. So if they move out tomorrow. I completely understand.
But for now. Time for a shower. No more moving soil bags for today!
PS: Just to let everyone who reads my stories know. I just love ya’ll. I am feeling all creepy crawling writing this So this is for you!
My Adventures In Farm Life 